Racing the Disabled


A summer day





Somehow he got away. Somehow he made it out. Somehow he hasn't ripped out his mane yet. Prince Blueblood, once the most vaunted, most glorious, and most amazing pony in the world, staggers into Ponyville covered in dirt and grime, looking more than a little traumatized. Ponies avoid him or look strangely at him. Just like he knew they would. The Prince has lost all semblances of dignity, wandering through Ponyville in a daze as he tries to get as far from Sweet Apple Acres as he can.
Rainbow_Dash does her best to do what she usually does: lay on a cloud and let the lazy summer days pass her by. Yet she's feeling a little tense today, however; the practical exercises for her training start next week, and she's been trying to review all that Weather Patrol knowledge she'd half-forgotten as soon as she made Flying Officer. Who knew that it actually be important later? "Let's see...the emergency team for forest fires is made of the...the Duty Patroller, and... Hey, I'm supposed to be relaxing! What gives!" Frustrated, she turns onto her side and tries to focus on how nice the clouds are today.
Blueblood is also trying to relax. He's trying to relax so. Very. Hard. He plops down at a cafe right underneath Rainbow Dash's cloud without even bothering to wash. Or smile. or do anything except stare ahead in a catatonic daze. A waiter comes up to him and hands him a menu. "Hello, good sir. Might we interest you in a rose garden delight salad-" "I AM NOT A PRINCE OF NOTHING!!!" Blueblood screeches all of a sudden. His horn glows and a teacup flies straight up off the table and right through the bottom of Rainbow Dash's cloud. At least it wasn't full!
Rainbow_Dash is jolted into action as a loud obnoxious yelling jars her tranquility and then, worse, a projectile pierces her platform. "WHOA! Whoa!" she shouts, leaping into the air and flying about, scouting for the source of the trouble. "What gives? Are we under attack? I...oh." She peers down at Blueblood, still familiar despite his obviously dirty and dishevelled state, and crosses her forelegs. "Hey, watch it! You're totally ruining my chillin' time, you know?"
Prince Blueblood looks around in mortified silence. The waiter looks nonplussed. "Um," says the Prince. "I, uh... I mean... yes. I will... have the rose garden delight." He coughs several times and tries to bury his face into the table, before Rainbow Dash gets his attention. "Oh, go away!" he moans up at the pegasus. "You aren't the only pony trying to 'chill' around here, Rainbow Dash! Some of us have REAL problems going on!"
"Oh, excuse me!" Rainbow Dash snorts. "I'm sorry that you have to hang out with regular ponies. It's probably /so/ frustrating." Her eyes roll as she makes her mocking attitude obvious. Blueblood deserves all the snark he can take!
Oh, Blueblood is NOT in the mood for this. His life is falling apart at the seams here and now his tribulations are being made light of! He sends a knife-edged glare straight up, standing away from the table. "I see, today is the day that Rainbow Dash goes around being a sarcastic little filly! Well two can play at that game!" He scrunches up his face and staggers drunkenly, flailing his hooves. "Ohhh, look at me! I'm Rainbow Dash, the national hero without a lick of empathy or understanding in my body! I can't be seen *helping* ponies in need, I'm too busy lounging around on CLOUDS while my RIGHTFUL RULERS crawl around in dirt and eat UNDERCOOKED APPLE PIE ALL DAY!" He spins and kicks his chair. He's really making a scene now, but he doesn't seem to care. "Easy for you to talk about hanging out with regular ponies up there! I've heard of you, Rainbow Dash! Self-centered and narcissistic to a T! You have no room to talk."
Being a sarcastic little filly is kinda how Rainbow Dash rolls, really. As Blueblood launches his cavalcade of insults, she just hovers calmly and makes an obvious yawn. "Hey, you done yet?" she says in the dismissive tone. "I kinda gotta get back to chillin' out."
Blueblood's eyes nearly bug out of his head. "What? WHAAAAT?" he yells into the heavens. "Oh, no! You're not getting off that easily! If I don't get to chill, nopony gets to chill!" He turns around and points at the bewildered Ponyvillians. "You all think you're so much better than me! Judging me! I see it! Reminding me over and over of all the times I've failed! Well I'll show you! I am not a failure! I am not insignificant! I am a PRINCE and I will WIN!" And with that, he throws another teacup at Rainbow Dash. "Because I challenge you, Rainbow Dash! Get down here and accept it right this instant, or I win by default!"
Rainbow_Dash idly and unconsciously strafes and dodges the errant tea cup. She looks quite bored and is glancing at her watch several times; at some point he'll become more irritating than entertaining, but until then there's no harm in sticking around.
"I challenge you to a race!" Blueblood snarls with a victorious grin. "A race of speed and skill and agility! You against me. Winner takes all. Um... winner takes... the loser must kneel! Yes! KNEEL in front of the winner and admit their superiority to the entire watching crowd. And what a crowd it will be, Rainbow Dash. I have royal connections. I'll bring the Princesses. The Wonderbolts. Everypony you know and love." His eye twitches. Surely Rainbow Dash, the greatest flier in Equestria, cannot resist *that* kind of opportunity. "You'll get to shame me in front of every pony in Equestria who was ever worth anything. But if I win... your humiliation will be abject and total."
Rainbow_Dash gives Blueblood a weird look. "You? Race me?" She hovers down closer and looks him over, tapping her chin. "Eh, I'll pass. I don't race against the disabled." Snap!
"But it won't be," Blueblood insists, leaning forward with a suspiciously confident grin on his face. "You see... I have a hobby, Rainbow Dash. That hobby is airships. Big ones, small ones, fast and slow, comfortable and spartan. I enjoy them. I enjoy *piloting* them. And I challenge you to race against me as I fly a brand new, top of the line, expertly engineered aircraft. You, the amazing Rainbow Dash, against the most powerful machinery that pony ingenuity can bring to bear. Your wings against the might of my engines. Your bravado against the growl of my propellors. You see, it won't just be to win. I will prove to all of Equestria that while *I* may be useless... Rainbow Dash is *obsolete.*"
Rainbow_Dash quickly shifts from resigned boredom to intrigued interest to mild indignation in the course of Blueblood's proposition. "You know what? I'm game for your stupid challenge, just so I can get you to finally quit your whining to my face. You're on." Her eyes narrow, but she's not too worried; no airship she's ever seen can go faster than the speed of sound...but she can!
Prince Blueblood's grin turns downright malicious. "Oh, perfect!" he crows. "I knew you'd see reason, Rainbow Dash. Very soon now, I will be showing all of Equestria that their - ahem - vaunted champion is heading straight for the retirement home. Such a shame. Still so young." He smirks and turns away, his mouth still running so fast his mind hasn't caught up with the sheer insanity of all he's saying. Challenging *Rainbow Dash*? To a *race?* No, this scheme is far too crazy for him to realize just how crazy it is right now. "We'll say... three weeks from now. I'll need the time to get everything together. And you'll want to set your affairs in order, I'm sure."
"That's plenty of time!" Rainbow Dash says. It also happens to be right before the big Weather Patrol leadership exercise at the end of her training, so it works out very well. "I'll show up that floating pile of twigs of yours, and then you'll be happy to work for Applejack instead of having to think about how much of a weasel-faced, cleft-chinned, weak-hoofed loser you are!"
"Ptoo!" Blueblood spits on the ground at Rainbow's hooves. "I'm not scared of insults anymore, Rainbow Crash," he sneers. "I've heard enough of those. Soon I'll prove how amazing I am. And you..." He shoves his face into Rainbow's, jamming his forehead up against hers. "You will be the first to recognize my greatness."
Rainbow_Dash presses her own forehead up against the prince's and gives him a hard glare. "It'll be my pleasure to totally wipe the floor with you!" she declares. "I'll see you in three weeks!" She backs off and bears away with her wings, still glaring down at Blueblood. "I'll give you that long to change your mind and, like, totally save yourself some trouble!" She winks at him menacingly before banking to the left and zipping off into the horizon to find a better napping spot.
((The race hasn't happened yet :u But it will!))

Log date: 

Saturday, July 5, 2014